Our goal is to build up and encourage people through photography. Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing. - 1 Thessalonians 5:11
Self-confidence. How many of us cringe at just hearing those words? I know I do. It's is not something any of us are born with. We have to work on it every day. We are surrounded by messages through TV shows, ads, social media, etc.. that tell us to look a certain way or it won’t measure up; it won’t be what people are looking for. I want you to take a moment right now and think about men and women sitting in an office creating those ads and messages you see. There are a handful of people making decisions that affect the masses (that’s why they get paid the big bucks). When we normalize those decisions they make, it’s a lot easier to think “I don’t agree with that” or “Actually, I know something else to be true”. My hope is that this blog post might give you a sense of hope or refresh what you already know about the subject. Next time you see an ad, I would encourage you to take a second and think about what thoughts you just had while watching or viewing it. How did it make you feel? What did it lead you to believe? Do you agree? Did it make you feel bad about yourself? The voice in our head changes when we don't actively reflect on what 'the world' is telling us. When we let the outside voices win, we fall into jealously, competition, comparing, and resentment towards ourselves. This leads to low self-confidence and living each day out of fear instead of peace and confidence in who we are.
Check out some tips below for ways to grow your self-confidence!
1. Affirm yourself.
It’s so easy to be sarcastic. You drop something and say “Oh sorry, I’m the worst” or “wow I’m so clumsiest person to ever live”. Our minds get really good at pulling up those responses quickly to deal with our embarrassment. But the thing is, we get used to saying things like that, that we start to believe it and put it on repeat. What if, still being sarcastic (because sarcasm is hilarious), we turned it into a positive saying? “Wow my hands are so small and cute they’re not used to carrying something so ugly” or “I think this is a good reminder to look at things from a different perspective” *lays on floor.
2. Do something that scares you.
Some try this every day, some once a week.. the point is to fail. Our self-confidence can grow when we learn to give ourselves grace when we make mistakes; and learn to fail without needing someone to come scoop us off the floor and say nice things to make us feel better. Your mistakes do not define you. You are free to learn what works and doesn’t work in life. Bravery is a milestone to self-confidence.
3. Care for yourself.
Adding to the conversation of “self-care”, I’ve seen a lot getting this wrong. Self-care does not mean “I feel sad. When I get home I’m just going to eat ice cream and watch TV and do nothing.” Self-care is not giving into what you ‘feel like’ doing. Self-care takes a lot of discipline that will affect you long term; it’s not a quick fix band aid. This is something I struggle with a lot. I use food to comfort me and TV to numb my emotions and distract me from what’s going on that I don’t like. Here are a few things you could do instead:
a. Write a letter to ‘your friend’ dealing with the same issues that’s bothering you. We tend to talk to other people a lot nicer than ourselves. After you write it, read it to yourself out loud.
b. Take a bath. Read a book (a book about an area in life you want to improve on, it's a learning opportunity). Light some candles. Relax your mind.
c. Go on a run or walk. I know, exercise. EW. But you gotta get those endorphins goin'! They literally make you feel better. And it’s a good time to think and process what’s going on.
d. Clean your room/closet. It’s a task that can be done easily. Cleaning doesn’t take too much brain power so your mind is freed up to process what’s going on.
e. Make an “I am” list. Create a list of things that are true about you and keep it with you. When you’re feeling like you want to go eat a whole pizza or meet up with that guy you know you will regret seeing, take out your list and read it out loud to yourself in front of a mirror. Super awkward at first; but speaking truth over yourself is going to make you more confident.
Here at Elite Photography, we aim to encourage you through photography; all over the Hampton roads area! Norfolk, Virginia Beach, Suffolk, Chesapeake, Smithfield and beyond. We offer portrait sessions and event photography to give you an experience that gives us the chance to show you how amazing you are. We don’t want you to feel like you have to come to the shoot at 100% self-confidence level. Our clients don’t come to us at 100% because that’s not real. While we photograph you, our goal is to get you to 100% because of the experience we get to share together. Wherever you’re at with how you feel about yourself, you are welcome here. We believe in you.
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